Selfless Living

Jason and I have just finished Matthew, the first Gospel and first book of the New Testament. Jason is a young man I'm helping to find his way in his walk of faith; some might call this discipleship. Anyway, we are, through the course of the next three semesters, reading through the New Testament, excepting the Revelation of John, in search of what it means and what it looks like for us to die to ourselves and take up our cross. As I've read through the pages of Matthew's Gospel letter, I've found with the help of the Holy Spirit bits of wisdom and elements of truth here and there concerning the theme at hand. Overall, what I found throughout the entire book was something I had not anticipated but should have expected.

As I read through the chapters of Matthew as he's retelling Jesus' story, I found myself confronted with not a collection of clues or a list of principles by which to live a life of selfless surrender, but rather the life and character and very nature of God as it was demonstrated in and through Christ. As I was looking for a method or a philosophy to help me shape my life into the self-denying image of the Christians that inhabited the first century church, I found instead a reason to shape my life into such a pattern of living. Reading about Jesus and his life among his creation, I began to see that I was approaching this study with a slightly skewed focus. When I drew up this study, my goal was to comb the scriptures from Matthew to Jude for wisdom and principles to guide my pursuit of life dead to self, completely surrendered to Christ. The error of this approach is best captured by one of Jesus' parables in chapter twelve of Matthew.

"43When the unclean spirit has gone out of a person, it passes through waterless places seeking rest, but finds none. 44Then it says, 'I will return to my house from which I came.' And when it comes, it finds the house empty, swept, and put in order. 45Then it goes and brings with it seven other spirits more evil than itself, and they enter and dwell there, and the last state of that person is worse than the first. So also will it be with this evil generation."

Building up to this passage, Matthew records the Pharisees testing Jesus, calling him Satan or a demon, and then demanding a sign. Then it's with the story of the return of an unclean spirit that he tells the Pharisees why he doesn't give them a sign. If they had proof that Jesus was in fact the son of God, they would, in the habit of their ingrained cultural mindset, attempt to follow and be devout to Jesus on their own power, apart from the Holy Spirit, forsaking the old covenant by which the Jews at his point in God's story received their communion with and blessing from God. They would, in an attempt to serve God in the only way that they knew how, leave themselves wide open to the influences of the enemy, the evil and unclean spirits of the world. Without the indwelling power of Christ's Holy Spirit and the righteousness that only He can give, a life in pursuit of pleasing God would prove disastrous (the Pharisee's demonstrated this with their customs and religiosity). The only thing staying the fatal wrath of God for them was their connection to Abraham and their citizenship in God's nation). As they would stray form God's Law that came by Moses, trying to follow Christ's teachings, they would leave their lives open to all kinds of outside influences.

My point in all this is that as Jason and I are seeking to find the path of God-honoring selflessness, to die to self, we must not leave our hearts and souls vacant. As we learn how to kill ourselves in a manner of speaking, we also need to seek to replace the freshly vacant place in our lives with something that will firmly and permanently occupy it, or it will be filled with something that we won't like, or that is not good for us. As we die slowly to ourselves, we need to look to Christ to fill that empty space that's been created. This is exactly what was stated in the intent of this three semester study Jason and I are undertaking, but up front, I didn't see what it really meant. As we lay ourselves down, we need to pick up the cross of Christ. Part of that is knowing what the cross is all about. And knowing what the cross is all about, we must know what Christ is all about. In short, the gospel of Matthew and the others (Mark, Luke, & John) are not places to glean principles for living or clues on how to live a Godly, selfless life. The Gospels are a place to look for a reason for living a Godly, selfless life. It is only on this strong foundation that the teachings and wisdom recorded in the acts of the apostles and their epistles can be applied in a Christ centered and God honoring way. To die to self and take up our cross literally means to lay down ourselves and take up Christ. Do this, set yourself aside and make Christ your entire purpose for living, and you will see a new world unfold before you eyes and experience a joy that was previously unthinkable.

Then Jesus told his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." --Matthew 16:24

The Strength of the Ox

King David was a strong and very influential man in the life and times of the Biblical Kingdom of Israel. He was the 'great warrior king' and a 'man after God's own heart'. He conquered the enemies of Israel, and held his reign over God's nation with His anointing for the longest of all the kings of Israel. It is fitting a king of David's character and reputation would produce the wisest earthly king ever to hold the throne of Israel. King Solomon, David's son, found favor with God as he prayed for wisdom to lead God's people. Finding Solomon to be a righteous man with a heart to please Him, God gave solomon all wisdom and blessed his reign with riches beyond compare. Solomon eventually lost God's favor by turning away from His commands, turning instead to the pleasures of this world. He did, however, impart his wisdom to countless generations through his books preserved in the scriptures before he made his exit, most notably the book of Proverbs (coming right after the book of Psalms, a good portion of which was written by his father). In the verses of Proverbs, we find many profound truths and observations of reality. I'd like to focus on one of these verses in particular. This proverb is profoundly accurate in describing simultaneously the truth lying at the core of both a life lived to the full and a life squandered.

Proverbs chapter fourteen verse four reads, " Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox." These words, up front may seem like meaningless ramblings, but within these two phrases are contained a truth that one would do well to pay attention to. To begin with, let's look at the two sides of this proverb and discuss and dissect it for its face value. The first part of the proverb states that "where there are no oxen, the manger is clean." Without overanalyzing it, this makes sense. If a manger is meant to house oxen, that will naturally mean that oxen would eat there. And where oxen eat they... well lets just say what goes up must come down if you catch my drift. Of course, if there are no oxen to... come down in the manger, the manger is clean. Easy stuff. What this also implies, as we can see, is that where there are oxen, the manger is messy. Anyone who has ever been around a feed yard where cattle are kept, or in a dairy barn, or in a stable knows that, when these are full of their respective tenants, they tend to have a very distinct oder. It's messy.

The second part of the proverb argues, "but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox." In the time when this was written, oxen were used as beasts of burden. They were used to pull carts, thresh grain, and tow plows. Any farmer that was serious about growing any kind of crop had an ox or a team of oxen. Basically, the ox was the equivalent of a tractor. So, to have any kind of crop, oxen were necessary. Pretty straight forward right? By putting these two face-value observations together, we should get a clearer picture of what this proverb is meant to communicate. Oxen are messy to keep, and to be without them would result in a clean(er) environment, but if one is to expect to raise a crop, one must have them.

It seems that, like most of Solomon's proverbs, it presents us with two incompatible realities. Reality one: Life without oxen is a clean one. Reality two: Life with oxen produces abundant crops. In presenting us with two realities that are mutually exclusive, that is, two realities that cannot exist together, Solomon presents us with a choice: Reality one, or reality two. In short, we can choose to be clean and tidy, or to be productive. It is in this distilled simplification of the proverb that we find truth that we can apply to many areas of our life. For example, if you have a shiny new car, you can either put in a garage or under a cover and never drive it in order to preserve its clean and shiny appearance, or you can use it to get from point A to point B and get it dirty with grime and dust and bugs and bird poo. The first choice would keep the car looking pretty and shiny, but would not be very practical at all. You would have an eighteen thousand dollar center-peice. The other choice would foul the pretty and shiny appearance of the car, but would allow you to travel much more quickly and easily between places. Or, to use a slightly more abstract example, one could either stay at home all day and do only the things one wanted to do like watch TV and sleep and maybe spend some time outdoors at one's own leisure, or one could get a job and work during the weekdays and subject oneself to activities that maybe aren't at the top of the list of fun things, in order that one can earn some money to live with. While the first sounds like it would be a good life to live, it wouldn't be very productive, and the quality of life would be severely hindered by a lack of resources. But the other choice would limit some of the immediate gratification, but would yield more resources and thus more options when the time came to enjoy ones free time.

The context that this applies most directly to, and that I would like to highlight, is that of the spiritual life, specifically, that of a believer; a follower of Christ. Jesus, in his commands and parables, tells us to do some things that could get pretty messy, some things that could drastically alter the course of one's life. In hearing these commands and the promises of what obeying these commands will yield, we are faced with the decision of Proverbs 14:4. We can remain clean and tidy, or we can dive into life headfirst for Christ and get messy, dirtying up our shiny lives and producing a crop for harvest. Jesus says "Give to the one who begs form you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you" (Matthew 5:42). He also says that when we give aid to those in need, we give aid to Jesus himself, who will in turn give us the Kingdom of heaven (Matthew 25:34,40). So when confronted with this command it's resulting effect, we can either, keep for ourselves our resources and our time, and let those in need find their own, maintaining a self-appeasing lifestyle, or we can give of our resources and our time, sacrificing what enjoyment we could have gained from those things for the enjoyment of others, and ultimately the eternal reward that is created in Heaven. The first is clean, and safe, and not very challenging, but it flies in the face of productivity for God's Kingdom. The second is messy; sometimes producing uncertain outcomes, and leaving us in situations that we might not be comfortable in, but will produce fruit in our lives and possibly the lives of others. The truth is, to follow Christ, to obey His commands and live the lifestyle that He calls all believers to live is messy and stinky and at times it can be very hard. But it's that lifestyle, the lifestyle that creates a messy and stinky and hard life, that will produce the most fruit for the Kingdom of God. Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strength of the ox.

The Wonderful Suffering of Christ
An Easter Letter

It's March fifteenth, a Saturday, and as I sit reading Matthew's Gospel letter, I arrive at Matthew 26:30, as Jesus tells his disciples they will all fall away. Tomorrow is Palm Sunday, so I am especially tuned into the Passion of Christ. As I get to 26:36 where Jesus begins to pray at Gathsemane, I begin to pay close attention to how Jesus acts in addition to what he says. Before he begins to pray, after taking Peter, James, and John on further into the garden, Matthew says Jesus "began to be sorrowful and troubled". Jesus, the Son of God, the King of Kings, who in the face of demons and even death itself maintained a calm and composed demeanor, was sorrowful and troubled. Matthew goes on. After telling his disciples that he is "sorrowful, even to death," and telling his disciples to wait where they were, Jesus goes further and falls on his face and prays "My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless not as I will, but as you will." Ignoring the prayer for a moment, what do Jesus' actions say about what he will soon be facing?

First, he becomes uncharacteristically heavy-hearted, and then he goes to pray, falling on his face. That, coupled with the prayer that he prays, gives us the impression that Jesus knew what was coming, and he knew it was going to be very hard. Matthew goes on. After he finds his disciples asleep and rebukes them, he goes to pray again. This time he prays "My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, your will be done." While this is a slightly different prayer from the first, I think we can safely infer that the desire behind the prayer is the same. We can see that Jesus is very troubled by what lies ahead of him. Matthew goes on. Jesus gets up and goes back to his disciples, finds them asleep again, but instead of rebuking them again, he goes back and prays again, the same prayer. To get a deeper perspective on what Christ was feeling here, I'll take you to Chapter 22 of Luke's Gospel letter. In Luke 22:44, Luke says, "And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground." Here we see in Luke's writing that Jesus wasn't just sorrowful or troubled, he was in agony. Dictionary.com defines agony as "extreme and generally prolonged pain; intense physical or mental suffering." Here we see Jesus' state of "troubled-ness" goes a bit deeper than what Matthew describes. It is clear to see, that Jesus, at this moment, would rather not do what he came to do. This seems to contradict Hebrews 12:2, which says "...for the joy set before him [Jesus] endured the cross..." But when you take the time to think through this contradiction, these two passages fit together to give us a greater picture of Jesus suffering. The agony of the crucifixion didn't begin when Jesus was scourged and beaten, but rather as he prayed in Gathsemane. Jesus, the Son of God, was both fully God and fully man, subject to all the pains, anxieties, and gut-wrenching emotions that we are. I would argue that part of the agony of the cross was the anxiety and fear that Jesus felt as he prayed in Gathsemane; as the hour of his pain, his payment in exchange for billions and billions of eternities of Hell, was growing close. It is here where he first shed blood, and it is here that he begins to feel the foot of God start to weigh heavy on him as God prepares to crush his own Son.

This Easter, think on this. And as you think on this, celebrate and revel in the love that God has for you and lift up prayers of joyful thankfulness as you, with all this in mind, think on Romans 5:7-8, which says "For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ [God] died for us." While Easter is a time to mourn that the broken world we live in and the broken and sinful bodies that we inhabit necessitated such a payment for sin, it is also a time to celebrate God's sovereignty, as no joy can be greater than the joy of a sinner saved, reconciled to the God and Creator for which he was made. This Easter, embrace the words of King David and join him in Psalm 71:23 - "My lips will shout for joy, when I sing praises to you; my soul also, which you have redeemed!"